Elton Brown 0:08

Welcome to SpeakUP! with Rita Burke and Elton Brown!

Rita Burke 0:13

Welcome. I am so delighted today to have my friend Asali whom I've known for a mighty long time. She's gonna be talking with us today. And who is Asali Asali is a leader in the early childhood education community. She's a mother, she's a grandmother, and she proudly says, and great grandfather! I asked her to tell me a little bit about what she likes and she likes reading. She's passionate about women's issues and she is deeply concerned about self care and self care issues. I asked Asali to share one of her favorite quotes with us and she'd said something that made me pause for a bit. She said, "Onward, ever backward, never" profound. I would say, as Asali Profound, and I thank you for that. I will remember. Asali here's my first question to you. Since you are so passionate about self care and about women's issues, help me understand what do you do to show kindness to Asali?

Asali Quamina 1:37

Rita, very interesting. I always go back to when you're traveling and the host will tell you, you need to take care of yourself first, because if you're not able to take care of yourself, then how can you take care of others? So that has been something I've always lived by, and I do try to do that. That, involves meditation. I like to do tapping I like to take care of my aunt, we take her feet. For granted, it takes us, it'd been occurring us for years, and we just take that for granted. So one of the rituals I have, I would foot soak like three times per week, and that's something that I enjoy doing.

Rita Burke 2:19

Foot soak three times per week. Yes, I do soak my feet, but I must say that I've never been so precise with it. Thank you so much. So you obviously take care of yourself.

Asali Quamina 2:32

Yes, I do. I try to do, I try to eat well. That's, and that's something it's a lifelong. You just can't say I'm gonna do it for three months or six months. I think it's a lifelong thing that you have to do because what you take in radiates out.

Elton Brown 2:46

I would say the same thing about your passion for women's issues. I'm wondering what was the last issue that you had to deal with for women in general?

Asali Quamina 2:59

I organized retreats for women and we would go away for the weekend and we would have people coming in doing different pampering sessions with us. Mind, body, spirit, which is very important. I, if you could just clarify what you meant by the question if I can elaborate more on.

Elton Brown 3:17

Trying to find out what the benefits are of whatever women's support group or effort that you were putting your efforts in. So it sounds like, you handled retreats, do you see the women when they arrive, and do you see a change in the women at the end of the retreat?

Rita Burke 3:39

Let me, but in a little bit. I don't mean to be rude as Asali and Elton, but I was one of the people who participated in Asali's retreats and I benefited tremendously. She would organize these sessions where people gathered and talk about taking care of themselves. She was a leader in our community from the inception when it came to putting your mask on first before helping others. So Asali So that a little bit more now, please.

Asali Quamina 4:11

That, that was something that I always wanted to do, right? Where we're organizing stuff for women and, that was done very creatively too. We had one we called Celebrate Yourself Breakfast, where that was done. Getting back to Elton's question is I think during the pandemic I organized because of the separation you couldn't get together. I organized the online group for the early childhood indicators where we met once a month and with that platform we had about 50 people. From all over came in once a month and we just talk about resilience and taking care of yourself during that pandemic and sharing strategies how we could survive and still be strong because in the end they still had to go back and work with children. And that makes a difference because when you are working with kids, you have to be whole. Because whatever you do rubs off on them. So that could be a recent something that was done with a group of women, if that answers your question.

Elton Brown 5:16

Yes, that does answer my question. Rita were you getting ready to say something?

Rita Burke 5:20

I can say something most certainly. That was a powerful gesture on your part Asali to have organized that thinking of the people who work in E.C.E. Now let me ask you a question. If your life were a book as Asali, what would you call it?

Asali Quamina 5:36

I would say Resilience or Resilient Me because, there's so much that happened and I think I've been able to bounce back. The work is not done. It's still in progress, but I think it would be the resilient Me.

Rita Burke 5:52

I like that because what I know about you, there's no question. You are a woman who's very capable of bouncing back. So expand on that a little bit more for me. You said you would call it Resilient Me. What would you call the first chapter?

Asali Quamina 6:10

Faith, I think because with all that we do, we have to have faith in whatever and to bounce back. We need to have that faith. We need to believe in who we are and what we can do, and being resilient. You need strength, you need. You need to be positive. You need that balance. Not everything is gonna be all positive. There's ups and downs and positive does not go without negatives, and we need that. But the thing is that you have to have balance. So like I would say Faith, As my first chapter.

Elton Brown 6:46

Okay. So in your book there is a section that talks about Resilient Me, and can you give us a taste of what that entails?

Asali Quamina 6:58

This goes back to as a teenager, not knowing anybody here coming as a 19 year old girl coming in here alone in this country in the seventies. That was tough for me and I had to do it. I remember my father he was concerned, Because he said, you're going to Canada. You can't even cook, you can't even boil some water, what's gonna happen to you? And I came up here and I had to do it alone. I, had to go to school it doesn't matter what you were, Cause when I left home, I was a teacher and you come here and you're nothing. So you had to start all over again. And I remember going down to a frost building, but that's to work with the government and standing there in line to get a job, and then you just took, whatever you got. My first job here was a microfilm operator. I knew nothing what microfilmed, but that's what I did and I had to do it right. And from there, back to school and the whole cycle goes on and it was a never ending thing, having kids struggling three, four jobs, So it's always a resilient, for me, it was always having to. That's trouble trying to keep your head above water, as they say.

Elton Brown 8:10

Going back to women's issues. I know that there were certain skills that had to be developed were any of those skills transferable to other parts of your life? And if so, can you give us an example?

Asali Quamina 8:26

You have to have order. That's a law. You have to have order, you have to be organized. I'm very creative. I like to do things in my hands. So you have to be organized to do that sort of thing for me. So I was, I think I'm quite in a quite organized, I like things to be in order and very dedicated and committed to what I do. If I, if I put my hand on something, I make sure it's done.

Elton Brown 8:51

You are an avid reader, so what type of books do you like to read and can you tell us the last book that you read and how did it make you feel?

Asali Quamina 9:02

Oh my God! The last, I'm reading, as a matter of fact, I'm reading a book on women who went to a lot of struggles right now and the story's just very, just black women who have had troubles, who have been molested, who had different issues, same thing that, happens every day. I listened I look at this TA hall program and she has a lot of guests that comes on and always have a lot of books that that you can always tap into. So I've been downloaded them from the library. The one I'm reading now is on Erica Kit who had this white daughter. and all the struggles she went through, the daughter went through and is now coming out talking about that in a book she has now. So that's the latest one I'm reading now. That's the two I'm reading right now. Wow. Oh, you a twofer, You, get to read two books at a time. Yeah, you can download them from the library. So I just download through the time and then you can put someone on hold and whatever. So that's the time dealing right now.

Elton Brown 10:01

Okay so you do a lot of reading and you believe in self care, which I think is very important and everyone should be able to relate to that. But in terms of women's issues and reading, I'm wondering how would any of this be relatable to a man?

Asali Quamina 10:19

I think it's all relatable I wish most men would take more care of themself.

Elton Brown 10:24

Yes.

Asali Quamina 10:25

Because they don't see it as that's something that they need to do. I don't know if it's an ego thing or what, but. Men should be doing the same things that women do, like taking care of your face, moisturizing your face, you tell a man like about that or even to go get your manicure pedicure done, they think that they sissy or whatever. That's unheard of, but I think it, it is transferrable because it all deals with total body care and health, and I think all the skills are transferable, especially when it comes to care. I tell my boys look after yourself, you owe yourself. Every year my birthday gift to myself is to go see a naturopathic doctor. I don't care how much it costs, right? That's what I do. I encourage them. I said, Medical is free. You need to go get your prostate checked. Do all those things, right? So I think it is transferable, but there's a there's a little I don't know how to put it. Like men are men, like when they do that, they think they're on too much on the girl's side.

Rita Burke 11:28

I'm so impressed with how you managed that question, because you're quite correct. healthcare is healthcare, well being and they cross over the gender and it sounds to me as if you spend a lot of time educating your boys, the men in your life about taking care of themselves. And so I particularly like something you said a little earlier about when you were coming from Guyana that your dad spoke to you, and it sounds to me as if your dad played a critical role in your life. Talk a little bit about that, please.

Asali Quamina 12:04

Oh, my dad, what a role model for us. He was the breadwinner of course, because, in those cultures the women stayed at home and my dad was a breadwinner, but he was not only the breadwinner, he washed our clothes. He went to the market, he did everything for us. He was a real father. Like we were sick. He would take care of us. We would go to the backyard, pick the lemon. The lemon grass leave, boil it, whatever. When we have a pain, he would cover tummy, put that grass on your tummy. He was like a nurse mother. Everything, he was everything to us. Everything. He did everything for us very. Very humble. Never, I never remember him hitting us or striking us. My mom was the one, she had a mouth, she had a hand. Everything went for her. But my dad, he was the most quiet and humble person I've known.

Rita Burke 13:03

Sounds to me Asali as if he certainly didn't fit into the image of what we know as men do this, women do this? He sound it to me as if he has some, He had some of the characteristics that we often will define or put onto the category of feminine characteristics.

Asali Quamina 13:22

Most definitely. He covered all of that and and I remember he loved music. And he smoked, he, he did smoke. He chain smoke that I remember quite well. He chain smoke and every Friday night he loved music. So he would go and buy, There's a special place he would go and he'd buy records and he would sit down and he would play those records. And it was three of us. Treatment was only three girls and it would take us one by one and teach us to dance, ah, every Friday night. So we look forward to. Frankie would just, we just sit there like a proud father and would just take us, say, hold your corner and you have to straight around dancing. So those are memories that, that stood out for me.

Elton Brown 14:09

So you like to dance eh?

Asali Quamina 14:10

I love to dance. Even now I do I just love to dance. Even like on Sundays there's this 98.7, the Soca time. That's how I do my workout. I'm in the kitchen here and. Working out when the grandkids are here. It's like a party on Sundays. Hey, I say it if the spirit moves you. Oh, it moves me. Just me. I can do it by myself. I can do it by myself. I don't need help.

Elton Brown 14:40

So what do you want to do for women in the near future? I'm assuming you have a goal, using this platform, you're able to get it out to the public. What it is that you want to do you, how can you help women in various areas.

Asali Quamina 15:00

Elton and Eita, my end goal is to have a book. There's so many untold stories that we have and that needs to be heard, and that's one of my goals. To just where we can have women telling these stories. And that's one of the things I'm really working on right now to have those stories told. It's time. It's time we come out and just we've been taught to just. Hold your thoughts or be quiet or not to speak up, or if you speak up, you're embarrassed, you're ashamed you're not who they think you are. And I think it's time these stories be heard, and that's something that I wanna do.

Rita Burke 15:40

Sounds to me as Asali is if you're living your best life right now and you are a visionary, And you've done, and you continue to do things that you enjoy doing and impact people's lives. And isn't that what womanhood is about? So I'm so delighted that you've been able to join us today. But listen, I've got a trick question for you and I want you to pause before you respond. So here it goes Asali. What is an unusual habit, or some kind of absurd thing that you love to do? I'll tell you, some people, you know what? They buy a sandwich and they have to open it and rearrange all of the stuff in the sandwich before they eat it. Some people like to eat special meals with their finger. Some people will put essential oils in their bedroom before they go to bed. Tell us about something that you consider to be unusual that maybe you wouldn't share with anybody else. Tell us about that unusual thing about the Asali. And we promise you that we wouldn't tell anybody.

Asali Quamina 16:52

The an unusual thing for me, right? It's buying a Harvey's Putin. I dunno if that's what you're looking for, but I love, I don't do it all the time, but that's unusual. I would love a Putin and I'm ver my grandkids hate to go with me because I'm very specific. It has to be, the fries have to be made right there and then. Yeah. And they have to separate. Like they can't pour everything on it. They have to put everything separate,

Rita Burke 17:22

And if you don't do that what will happen?

Asali Quamina 17:24

I don't take it. My grandkids get very upset. They say they're embarrassed every time I go, that, the fries has to be hot and then I have to give the instruction. I need everything separate. I want, I won't eat it.

Rita Burke 17:36

We're promising that we're not gonna share. Anybody. That's our little secret.

Asali Quamina 17:42

You can share it.

Elton Brown 17:44

No, it's gonna be shared. Don't listen to Rita. It's going to be shared. We're doing this podcast,

Rita Burke 17:53

So let me then wrap up by saying, as Asali, I am so thankful to you. For joining us and for sharing just a smid about who Asali is and about Asali life and about Asali determination and her resilience and her ability to thrive. Is there anything that you would like to say to us before we turn off the mic, please?

Asali Quamina 18:20

I've had some great successes and I can truly say I'm at peace right now. I wanna do things. And I think I'm, I'm able now to do it with grace and poise. The work is not done and I don't think it'll ever be over. And I just wanna be part of this so that I can just share and whatever it is I have left in me to do what I have to get done. And I thank you for having me, and I hope I did answer your questions and be blessed.

Rita Burke 18:52

You're more than welcome, and the next time we meet, we'll talk about your podcast. That is coming up. Thank you, Asali.

Asali Quamina 19:00

You're welcome. Thank you so much. I appreciate you. Thank you.

Elton Brown 19:04

Thank you.

Asali Quamina 19:05

Okay. Thank you Elton.

Elton Brown 19:08

If you would like more information about our guest, Asali. Please send your questions to speakup@speakuppodcast.ca. Rita and Sam Burke has written a children's book titled. I like being me. The book will continue to build your child or someone you know confidence. If you have questions about the book or would like to request a copy. Please send your request to info@speakuppodcast.ca. Thank you!